Shout Out to Chandler's Friends

Shout Out to Chandler's Friends

My heart aches for Chandler’s friends. I know what it’s like to lose my son. I don’t know what it’s like to lose the buddy I went to parties with and jumped off things with and surfed with and skated with and shared my deepest secrets and struggles with….

I just don’t know.

I see the constant stream of faces coming in and out of the hospital from December 15 through January 1. Young faces and not so young. All friends of the young man I am privileged to call my son.

I remember their shock at seeing their strong, vibrant friend lying motionless in that bed. Their tears. Their words to Chandler — “You got this, Chan Man.”

I remember so many hugs. Healing hugs, comforting hugs, hugs of desperation and fear. If one of my theories is true and Chandler was actually somehow privy to what was going on in that room, he was proud of how his friends came together for him, for one another, and for our family.

I remember being amazed at the depth of their responses, their commitment to coming to see him, and thinking, “Chandler has the best friends on the planet.”

This is on my mind a lot, especially this week because one of Chandler’s friends had a birthday. Chandler would have been right in the middle of the celebration. I know his friend felt the loss, the pain.

For Chandler, his friends were life itself.

I’m so grateful that you, his friends, loved him so much. You made his life rich. You joined him on adventures. You were his cheerleaders, his confidantes, his sounding boards, his dance partners. You invited him into your lives. That meant the world to him.

And it means the world to me.

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